Working towards our own irrelevance
Ego death and regenerative purpose
For nearly a year, I have been preparing to host a natural building workshop on my land. Last December, I met a hempcrete builder who was visiting the community where I live. The wheels started turning then.
There’s been a lot of activity to prepare for this one day. We’ve had meetings, conference calls, concept drawings, poster designs, social media marketing, site clearing, supplier logistics, delivery challenges, weather delays, and messages upon messages upon messages.
This building workshop is happening on my land, right now, as I am writing this essay. And I am not there. By choice.
When I first imagined “missing out” on the training that I had orchestrated, honestly, it was driven by fear. Given recent scrutiny around regulations for foreigners doing business where I live, I started thinking it would be less stressful to remove myself from the picture.
As the day approached, my nervousness subsided. It no longer felt like a big deal to be there. It seems safe now. No reason not to be able to witness and receive the fruits of my investment.
Yet when I tuned in, I heard the same message repeated, “Don’t go.” Only now, it was served up without the flavor of fear mixed into it. Of course, my FOMO didn’t like hearing this. Ego-mind stomped its feet and whined, “But why?” No reason was given. But still, I listened.
I accepted this directive without rational reason. It’s only now, as I sit on the sidelines, that I see higher alignment at work. Putting myself on “time out” was designed to show me something — and to initiate me in a felt sense of ways of leading that are coming online now.
All the dominoes are set up; they will fall into place according to gravity and momentum. The essential people are in connection. Everyone knows their role, and is empowered to make decisions. My presence is no longer needed. It is humbling to see that.
It’s not about me, or the projections that others place onto me. Humanity is maturing. We are outgrowing the childish habit of idealizing a guru, obeying a boss, or pedestaling some figurehead persona. These kinds of power dynamics are woefully expired.
In fact, you’re probably a pretty terrible leader, if the people around you are constantly looking to you for direction. That’s not leadership. It’s control and codependence. We no longer look up to and imagine leaders as superhuman. That’s just a bad habit that we developed — looking outside, and detracting from our inherent power and authority.
The way we lead has to change because consciousness is rising. Leadership is no longer about making all the decisions, managing the process, or owning the results. It is about seeing others’ gifts, connecting them, elevating them, appreciating them, and allowing space for their highest potential to be expressed. And then surrendering the rest.
In this era of human renaissance, leadership is a far cry from the toxic power games we’ve seen on television. In the New Earth, leadership is more like setting alight the firecracker that you happen to find in your hands, then stepping back to see its shape and color reveal itself.
This new way of leading is about witnessing miracles; it is feeling blessed. We just have to get out of the way, as the coherent, intelligent, living human ecosystem lights up in wonder at its own magic.
Personally, I am no longer striving: as the heroine, the savior, the leader, the teacher, the boss bitch, the good girl, or the responsible one. It is so much more easeful to be a tiny spark of life among many. I let myself be moved by something beyond mind, beyond ego, beyond plan. I am not individually responsible. I don’t need to keep control. It’s not about being a helicopter mom and micromanaging the details.
I lit a simple altar on-site, first thing this morning. I prayed for the safety and well-being of all life forms in this web of creation — both human and non-human. I prayed for the enjoyment and expansion of all the human participants. I asked to bless the space itself, and all the plants and the animals in it. I knelt on the ground in gratitude, thanking the land spirits for providing all this abundance and protection. And then I left.
As I write this, dozens of other people are working, learning, and connecting on the land without me there. Meanwhile, I am embracing my own sort of ritual of initiation — a solo immersion in the experience of becoming irrelevant. I am truly surprised and happy to discover so much joyfulness in the celebration of my own unimportance.
I can envision something, commit to its creation, activate resources to support it, and weave the team to make it happen. Then I can step back and let it unfold without my interference. I am no longer needed.
I am no longer needed!
Instead of bringing sadness, that thought now registers as success. Because in the new paradigm, reaching irrelevance means you are done – and your job is well done.
With Regenerative Purpose, we work towards manifesting a world where our purpose work is no longer needed. It is the opposite of an ego-driven mission — the old paradigm where we built empires centered around us, and assembled shrines of self-importance.
Regenerative purpose holds within it this paradoxical antagonism of personal role and soul mission. For example: If you are a meditation teacher, it means you want to live in a world where meditation is second nature for all humans, and practiced from a young age. If you are a natural builder, it means you want to live in a world where building with local, organic, non-toxic materials is the norm — not something special or different.
In other words, a regenerative purpose does not reinforce identity. When we are successful at it, it actually dismantles the identity that was formed in the process. And when we let go of identity, we are open and available to be directed to our next assignment.
I do not worry about being unemployed. Of course I can choose that; there may be times when I fall into the void to rest and reset. But I no longer cling to an identity anchored by my work in the world. The more readily I release roles, the more quickly I can be called upon for another purpose. As it is, I have a long line of creations queueing for attention. I don’t have to figure out what to do; I simply choose what to focus on first.
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